Super Bowl Prop Bet Predictions

Well, it is Super Bowl Sunday, the most over hyped sporting event for the most overrated sport. Some people want this day to be a national holiday… I think that these people are fucking idiots. It is a day where I want to kick people who talk about their numbers in their Super Bowl square pools because it is fucking annoying. No one else gives a shit about their numbers, so shut the fuck up!  So to get into the spirit of today, I am going to annoy people with my predictions of prop bets that I found across the internet. Why prop bets? Because, I could care less about the details of the actual game. Let's see how many I get correct.

1. How Many Times Will Peyton Manning Be Shown On Television During The Game?

• Four times or more (-130)
• Three times or less (-110)

Commercials count for this, right? That idiot is everywhere. Besides, he won a ring so I am sure they'll do a brother comparison shot. I am going with Four times or more… Does anyone else think Peyton resembles Timmy from South Park?

2. How Many Times Gisele Bundchen Be Shown On Television During The Game?

• Once Or More (-200)
• None (+150)

She is hot! Brady does not deserve that ass… The network will show her as many times as humanly possible. Once or more! 

3. How Many Times Will Robert Kraft Be Shown On TV During The Game?

• Four times or more (-140)
• Three times or less (EVEN)

The Patriots have won 3 other Super Bowls, laws of averages tells me they’ll show clips of him from each as well as at least once for the game in progress. Network coverage is predictable… Four or more

4. How Many Times Will David Tyree's Catch Be Shown During The Game?

• Twice or more (EVEN)
• Once or less (-140)

I’m sure that they’ll show it from every angle that exists… Twice or more

5. What Will The Result Of The First Challenge Be?

• Play overturned (-115)
• Play stands (-115)

Who gives a shit… I’ll say play stands because officials are gutless and will not want to make a controversial reversal.

6. If Tom Brady's Son Is Shown On TV, Will He Be Wearing A Tom Brady Jersey?

• Yes (-170)
• No (+130)

I say yes… Drew Brees set the bar on that one.

7. Will Madonna Wear A Hat At Any Point During The Halftime Show?

• Yes (-120)
• No (-120)

I say no… she wouldn’t want ruin her hair in front of the largest television audience she’s ever been in front of. Fucking diva!

8. What Will The Color Of Gatorade Be During The Gatorade Bath?

• Clear/Water -- 3/2
• Orange -- 5/2
• Yellow -- 5/2
• Red -- 13/2
• Green -- 15/2
• Blue -- 10/1

I’m only saying yellow because I want to imagine it being piss dumped on someone’s head.

9. COIN TOSS.

• Heads (-105)
• Tails (-105)

Tails never fail…

10. Will Victor Cruz Have A Touchdown In The Super Bowl?

• Yes (EVEN)
• No (-130)

YES! I want to see that idiot make a fool of himself doing that ridiculous salsa dance…